humility: 2/11/11

la palabra es humildad

our day culminated with those words

as i’ve seen my father grow into someone who own’s himself

i value my worth

it is his choice of words

every breath he forgives himself to take

unleashes his remorse

i treasure the moments where he uncovers what has been

buried over time

if you met him

you couldn’t imagine that

like me

he also reads thoughts

we choose when we speak of them

without being cunning

because for some the truth is too much

there’s a limit to how much we are pushed

there is a limit to how much we will allow others to undermine

the tribulations it has taken for us to be present in this lifetime

if you knew where i came from

your calendars and sun gods would be put to shame

my ancestors live in my morning reflection

no i ain’t vain

i just don’t live in your pain

i can dodge the darkness

of backwardness

but then i would be worthless

every pyramid

every tomb

every womb

is a reminder of the pillage of savages

is a reminder

my genius survived

this will never be a solo show

in the highest of the high

i am not alone

in the lowest of my low

my spirit will not implore

i will not fall to the floor

so when you get pissed with envy because you think my drive

is only to get mine

i will read you your rights:

you have the right to help me

or get out of the way

i don’t give a damn about your excuses or

what the other fools will say

our people are dying. wake up.

our stories have vanished. wake up.

our sages are expiring.

wake up.

la historia de un corazoncito

la historia de un corazoncito 

I hold with compassion

This fragile truth

That even with a fucked up childhood-

I learned to love

decoded

the dissemination

of abuse

and affection-

I learned to love

Y en mi tumba yo dire

Que si he amado

El corazon de otros yo si he tocado

Velando voces

La memoria es escrita por

Lo que uno escoje

Y a veces recoje al partir

“El punto es que hay que seguir”

Sin maldecir lo pasado

Acabo que eso queda en el ayer

Los que si vive  es el santito lugar donde nuestro corazón

Planta los pies

Se dice otra vez:

Te quiero

Te aprecio

Te estimo

Te admiro

Pero no me intimidas

Yo si te voy a querer

Por que te amo

Amigo del alma

Tu sangre palpita y me da vida

Tu eres la fuente de mi ser

Y aunque a veces me envenenas

Con caprichos aturdidos

Te dejo correr

Pero cuentan que por fin la ciencia

Comprueba

que

the heart breaks as it ache

entonces lo unico que te digo

es que,

si eres de sangre y hueso

No te dejes guey!

---

Though I can say that in this lifetime I have been blessed to be in love, I am grateful to realize this year that:

 i AM LOVE. You are love. We are love.

thank you for existing. as my reflection, i learn love from you. 

love yourselves. 

gonna get on up

intimately we weigh out the silence
and for how long we will have to carry it
---
if bullets were made to aim
their desired target
i wouldnt feel this wrench in my stomach
no doubt that life
and sustenance
has a different meaning on the black market
blocks
where you can trade rock
for a cuete
call slick up for a hit
and have rent paid
before the 5th

i evict the habits
of finding love addicts
no one should try hard at it

it just is
as i am

i introduce my game
little attitude
shifting moons
warming the air with a sweet disposition
never get used to the abuse
no bitter words
or rants
tell me what you want
love chant
---
what if it means more
than what i wanted it to
what if i get misconstrue
have to explain my way out of something i did not do
---
what if i did want to go there?
in those moments
where we want to share
but are scare
of judgement
committing to our own fallacies

what if i change my mind
grow out of it

what will you think of me
if i disclosed
this truth
my truths
the true ones
without ambivalence

so no law obligates you to respect me
no mandate forces you to accept me

without abjection
or restrictive affection-
you kiss dictates your surrender